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What Wars Called "A Pill” m Onion ’Iimts. Old mm Mg Sum; rr'l‘iu‘ Ruin-a4 of 1:10. Roms“ The Roman fortunes would not be i thought extraordinary at London, Paris, or New York. A lJ‘rench financier, reputed to have left between 20,000,000! and 30,000,- i 000, on hearing that the senior partner of a i well-known English house had left only 1,500.000l exclaimed, “Ah, je le croyais plus a son aise.” Crassus used to say that ‘ no man was to be esteemed rich who could i not out of his own revenue maintain an army, but his fortune is estimated by l’liny at less than 2,000.0001. ll e added to it by commercial enterprises and the skilled labor of slaves; but the rich lbinan commonly lived upon his capital ; investments were precarious ; to save was to invite prescrip- tion; and when popularity led to power ‘ and power to wealth, the patrician dema- gogue, bent on making a fortune, began by spending one. Caesar owed nearly 300,000! ‘ before he filled any public office. The deth ‘ of Clodius were computed at double the sum. Mr. Trollope, in his able and spirited defence of Cicero, contends that he did not ‘ owe more than a Roman of rank might or ought to owe, and a partisan of \Vilks main- tained that he did not squint more than a gentleman ought to squint. Cicero, after buying one of the finest horses in Rome with borrowed money writes: “ Know then that I am so much in debt that I should be willing to conspire, if any one would accept me.” \Ve recollect from his letters that he had “several Villas” besides his town house. He Speaks of them in the tone of the nabob who ordered “ more phactons” to be brought round. His Tuseulan Vllla had belonged to Sylla. A house of Clodius sold for 80,000]. C:eci1us lsidorus bequeathed 4,1lli slaves, 3,600 yoke of oxen, 27,500 head of other cattle, and 60,000,000 of sesterccs (500,000!) in money. Owing probably to the insecurity of tenure, nothing is set down for land. This Czccilius was not a man of taste, or jewel- lI‘y, or plate, and objects of rertu would have have formed no inconsiderable portion 01 his possessions. Profuse expenditure was one of his stepping-stones of ambition, a matter of calculation or necessity in an aspirant to high office or command. Cras- sus, when a candidate for the Consulship, gave a feast of 10,000 tables, to which all the citizens of Rome were indiscriminately invited. Caesar, to celebrate the funeral of a daughter, gave one of 22,000 tables, with accommodation for three guests at each table. The entertainment was repeated and exceeded for his triumph. He brought together more gladiators and wild beasts than Were ever produced on any former oc- casiou in an amphitheatre. but his exhibi- tions of this kind were so completely out- shone that it were a waste of time to dwell upon them. In a document annexed to his statement Augustus states as a title a pub- lic gratitude that he had exhibited 8,000 gladiators and brought more than 3,500 wild beasts to be killed in the circus. In the course of the festivities instituted by Titus to celebrate the opening of the Colosâ€" seum 5,000 wild beasts were let loose and killed by the gladiators. The Emperor Pro- bus collected iorasingle show 100 lions, 100 lionesses, 100 Libyan and 100 Syrian leopards, 300 bears, and 600 gladiators. Having caused the circus to be planted with trees to resemble a. forest, he let loose 1,000 ostriches, 1,000 stags, 1,000 does, and 1,000 boars, to be hunted by the populace, who were to keep whatever they could catch or kill. The ficrcer animals were encount- tered by the gladiators. It does not appear how long this show lasted. Although given to illicit pleasures in his youth, Augustus was temperate in his habits after he became Emperor, and he tried to check the progress of corruption, but it was in the bosom of his own family that it proved irrepressible. His daughter Julia was the centre of a gay and glittering throng of young patricians, and became so conspicuous for her dissolute behavior that he had no alternative but to exile her. \Vhen reproached by a friend for her extravagance in dress, she replied : “My father does not know how to preserve his dignity. As for me I know and shall never forget that 1 am the daughter of the Emperor.” â€"~â€"â€"â€"â€"-â€"-uu «Ow upâ€"â€"â€"â€" fl Blisters Not a. Monopoly ! The following paragraph from the Daily News, will probably give rise to acontrover- sy as to whether Montreal (‘1’ Birmingham has the right to the credit of having origin- ated the blister system of puni hmunt : Afew days ago an enquiry into the Bir- mingham \Vorkhouse scandle was opened by Mr. Henley and Dr. Mount, two of Her Majesty’s inspectors. Mr. Henley, the sen- ior inspector, stated that they would thoroughly examine the medical adminis- tration of the woxkhousc next month. At present they would invasligate the specific charges against the medical staff of using the shower-baths. blisters, and padded room for punishments, contrary to the ofiicial reg- ulutions. Dr. Simpson, the senior medical officer, was represented by counsel. Mary Ann Skeet, an inmate of the epileptic ward, swore that shower-baths and blisters had been several. times administered to her as a punishment and that she was constantly threatened with them. She was unable to sleep at night when she knew she was so to be dealt with. She was in pain for six weeks after one of the blisters had been put on the neck. An under nurse who has since left the Workhouse gave evidence that the head nurse threatened to get the patients a blister or shower-bath for the simplest thing even for using soap extravagantly. She had known blisters inflicted immediately after these threats. The blisters always made Skeet have bad fits. Skeet swore she had to be forced into the shower-bath. Mr. Hlil, master of the workhouse, produced the hooks in which should have appeared all cases of shower-bath or padded-room treat- ment. Many entries appeared to be aito- gether ommitted. He was entirely ignorant of such punishment being inflicted. The enquiry was adjourned. â€"â€"â€"â€"‘»4-->09-â€"â€"â€"â€"â€" EXPENSIV’E.â€"â€"It is all right to toll a hell, but it makes a ditference how you do it. A Coming man once tolda belle he would marry her, and it cost him $2,000 because he did not. ROMAN FORTUNE-ES- 'I lu- Qnmlur‘y {m' “"1th is money ‘/ How did it come into the world? Obviously“incentestably ---â€"it is a tool, an instrument, nothing else. it is not an object sought for its own sake, to be kept and used. it is acquired solely for the sake of the work it does»~â€"a mere machine. The sovereigns which a man carries about in his purse are distinctly intended to be set to work, and that work is solely to be ‘ given away in exchange for something else. Money is the tool of exchange, the instru- ment of obtaining for its present possessor some commodity or service which is desir- ed. But how did the necessity arise for in- venting: such a tool ‘3 Many economists answer that a measure of value was needed, a. contrivance which should enable men to compare with each other the several values or worths of the commodities they handle. The farmer required to know how many sheep he ought to give for a cart. Thus money was devised to meet this want. But this is an entire mistake. A measure which should tell accurately the worth of one com- modity compared with that of another was 'ant created by civilization as it developed itself. A far more urgent need made its ap- pearance at an earlier period. Money got over the greatest difiiculty which the social life of men encountered. Human beings, unlike almost all animals, were formed to make different commodities for each other; how were they to be exchanged? How could the men who mutually wanted each other’s goods be brought together for exchanging ‘3 A farmer was in want of a cost, but the tailor had no desire to obtain a calf ; he was in want of shoes. Here were two sellers and two buyers, and yet neither could procure what he needed. Money came to the rescue. The farmer sold his calf ’lo a butcher for money, and with that money he procured the wished-for coat from the tailor. The tailor repeated the process with the shoe- maker. Thus money solved the diiiiculties. Four exchangers were brought together in- stead of two, and two articles were sold and two bought with money; and by this em- ployment of a common tool for exchanging, the greatest principle of associated human life was establishcdr~division of employ- ments. It is plain that the money first bought the calf and then travelled on to buy the coat. It circulatedâ€"it remained perâ€" manently in no hands. It fulfilled its one serviceâ€"to exchange, to place two diiferent articles in different hands. Each man who obtained the money intended to pass it away in turn. Thus the conception, tool. comes out transparently. It performs its functions by substituting double barter for single: the farmer first barters his calf for money and then barters away the same money for a coat. This conception of money dives into its essences: that money is a tool must never be left out of mind; it governs every thought every word, about money. If money was never thought of but as a tool, the world would be saved a vast amount of idle speak- ing and writing. MO<O>IOW~ The Force of Imagination. They worked a racket on young Giiph at his boarding house recently. They detected him raiding the pie closet, and found that he had got away with a mince-pie, some cookies, some dough-nuts, and some cheese. The landlady and her daughter together re- solved on vengemice. They waited till Mr. Griph had devoured the food that he had taken and made his appearance in the sit- ting-room. Then the landlady said to her daughter, “Mary you know that mincepie that we made out of the meat we bought of the strange butcher, and which proved to be mule meat?” “Yes, mother,” “What did you do with it?” “Put it aside to give to tramps.” That made Griph, who over- heard, uneasy. “And Mary, you know those cookies that the cook carelessly spilled the kerosene overâ€"-â€"what did you do with them?” “Put them with the pic.” Griph recolleeted that there was a. 'qucer taste to those cookies, and kind of felt like a man who had just started in on the miseries of a first sea voyage. But he tried to shake the feeling off. “And Mary," continued the old lady, “you know the cook carelessly used some very bad eggs to make some doughâ€" nuts?” 1 put the dough-nuts aside for tramps, too; and I guess when they come to eat ’em they’ll think they’ve swallowed an earthquake.” Griph felt that he had. The sea-sick feeling seemed to ‘ grow instead of shaking off. He grew pale and shivered. The ladies were delighted. “Mary,” said the old lady, “when you give those things to the tramps, don’t give them the cheese that’s with ’cm, for I put poison in to kill rats.” Thanriphwanted to hesiok. \Yith a melancholy howl he sprang up, rushed up to his room and took an emetic that, nearly brought his feet up. And he had a chill and a headache, and went to bed and stayed there for two days. And most of the time the landlady and her daughter laughed consumedly, M ~â€"â€"â€"-n» «or» «nâ€"-â€"â€"â€"~ A Remarkable Curiosity. Hermann, the celebrated preslnligitator, on his recent return to Vienna from a long and exhaustive professional tour through South America, presented the imperial Museum of Natural History with a large number of curiousarticles picked up by him at different times in the course of his Tran- satlantic wanderings. The qualities object in this interesting collection is; :1 war trophy (if the .Ji\‘:1ros, an linliun tribe inhabiting the State of Ecuador. It consists of the en- tire scalp and {nee-skin of a warrior, care- fully lioned and dried by interior applica- tions of heated stones. The flowingr hair, bushy eyebrows, and stronglyqnarked feat- ures are carefully preserved ; but the last, in consequnice of the peculiar treatment to which they have been submitted, are shrunken so small that the whole face is lit- tle larger than a baby's clenched list, and looks like awell-executed miniature carv- ing. It is. moreover, as hard as wood and extremely light. These dried and contrast- ed masks are by no means inconvenient to wear as trophies of victory. and possesses the paramount advantage that they tell their own story. In the case of more sealps one resembles another so closely that their enviable proprietor may readily experience some (lifiieulty in identifying such souv- enirs of triumph from their original owners. But there can be no mistake about a relic which preserves the features, however re- duced in size, of avanquished foe. Nothing except, perhaps, his photograph, can re- mind one more vividly of it (lead enemy than his own face prepared in the. .l'ivaros fashion. \Vhat is Honey? New York Sun, Many tussians are partially proud of the fact that their country is the largest in the world. No State, ancient or modern, ex- cept the {oman Empire, can stand compari- son with the Russian empire in size, and thereforethey say it is perfectly proper that the autocrat of all the Russias should be called the Czar, which is a short form of Czesar. The analogy between the empire of the (Jzars and that of the Caesars of ancient times, and the dissolution which befell the Roman empire is surely in store for Russia. In fact, all the Russias have never been one country in either a political or a social as~ poet, and all the attempts of a. Moscovite statesman to Russianize the numerous peo- ples living under the Czsr’s sceptre have so far utterly failed. Half of the Cmr‘s Hundred Million sub- je’ots not Loyalâ€"SIM tho Revoltuun- ary Struggle Entered 2:303: a. Kew Phrase? Finland is now as foreign to Russia as it was at the time of its forcible annexation to the Czur’s dominions. Its language, religion, customs, and very administration are differ- ent and quite distinct from thoseof Moscow. Finland is governed by its own, which is in- dependent to the Senate of Russia. The Fins have money, postal and custom stamps, and ofl‘icial documents of their own, and their hatred to Russian rule is as strong as ever. Poland, though officially it does not exist, is nevertheless a, perpetual scarecrow for the Czar’s Government. Repeatedly the popu- lation of Poland has been decimated, re- peatedly the streets of “Warsaw has been flooded with Polish blood, and the Siberian mines packed with Polish patriots; and yet the Poles stand firm. Their watchword is revenge, and their national song is, “Yet Poland has not perished.” It is doubtful whether Poland can ever be restored as an independent State, but it is yet more doubt- ful whether the Poles and the Russians can ever be reconciled to one another. The population of the provinces which constitute White Russia. is Russian only in name, being of a. different race from the M uscm'ites, and having its own religion and language. The “7hite Russians have always lived under the Polish influence, for the rea- son, as the Poles claim, that the science. art and literature of Poland are as yet superior to those of Russia. The memory of their country's independ- enee is not yet extinct among the popula- tion of the beautiful part of Russia known as Little Russia. The Cossacks of the Dnei- per have a glorious. even a heroic, history of their own. Once it was in their power to destioy either Poland or the Moscovite State; being orthodox, theyjoined the latter and Catholic Poland was doomed. But the treacherous Museovites poorly rewarded their ally ; the Muscovitc generals were granted the best land in Little Russia, and the Little Russians of to-duy are strictly forbidden to use their language in schools, in public oificesl or in literature. The three Baltic provinces, Kurland Esh- bland and Livland, are Germanin name and fact, and they steadily propagate German ideas among the Russians of the neighbor- ing provinces. They scorn everything Rus- sian. and defy the Russian administration, being sure of protection from Genfihny. Tlfe lands of the Don Cossacks, the Ural Cossacks, and the Kuban Cossacks, though they have been under the Czar’s rule for cen- turies, are, in fact, self-governed, and every attempt to put these countries on the same footing with the rest of the Russian provin- gas has met with bloody oppcsition. True to the traditions ef their ancestors, the Cos- sacks love freedom :1 great deal more than pleases the Czar. The Caucasus, with its 5,000,000 warlike people, belonging to a. dozen different tribes, is as yet held by the Czar on the footing of a conquered country, and a. large army is constantly kept there, which not only con- sumes all the taxes collected in the Cauca- sus, but also draws annually several million roubles from Russia. 'l‘urkestan and other Asiatic provinces re- cently annexed to Russia are looked upon even hv the Russians themselves as tempor- m‘y possessions, which can only be kept un- der subjection to the Czar at a great and continual loss of men and money. Last of all, Siberia, one of the richest lands on the globe, turned by the Czar’s de- spotism into a. purgatory, nay, into a \‘Cl'y hell, is that country loyal and true to the Czar? It would be unreasonable that those who live amid endless tom's, tortures, and bloodshed should feel anything but repug- nance to the authority in whose name these horrors are committed. Of all the Russios, then, only great Rus- sia, the central part of the empire, remains true to the Czar. Thus Russia. disappears, and Muscovy re-appczn's. 1b is no secret here that all the above month-nod provinces can by no means be counted am loyal to the er. The aggregate population of those provinces amounts to about filty millions, or just a. half of the population of the Russian empire. Therefore the sz r has tr turn a half of his people into soldiers, policemen and spies to watch over the other half, and thus to preserve hi, authority. It is evidert that under such circumstances even a single eonspirator is of great importance, for it may depend upon him to turn the balance in favor either of loy alty to the Cmr or of rev- olution. This explains why the Czar, as soon as he discovered a handful of daring conspirators proclaimed the state of seige, suspended the common law, created at once half :1. dozen minor Cmrs, utterly neglected the interests of agriculture and industry, and directed his huge army, two millions strong to hunting out that handful of con- spirators. Yet it was all in vain. There is a rumor that the revolutionary struggle here has entered a new phase; that the conspirators now have in view not the killing of another Czar, but the killing of Uzarism itself; for their ideal, the federa- tion of the free Russian States, cannot be realized before the absolute empire is des- troyed. Are we about to witness the disso- lution of that huge, inordinate, and already partly paralyzed politicial body that men call (.‘zardom ? It has been a long time since an Enoch Arden case was reported in the newspapers. Are the old chaps who come home and look into the windows after nightfall rather glarl 01ft, 01' are they hiding their grief? WILL RUSSTA FALL T0 PIECES T loo <o>o¢ “‘vVhat I was gwine to remark,” said Brother Gardner, as the back end of Pula- dise Hall grew quiet, "Was to say to you dat do punson who expects to injcy dis litc mus’ make up his Ininu to strike do world on de gineral average. He who neglects to do so will meet wid daily sorrows and disapiutâ€" ments. Doan’ expect dat do man who hap- pens to agree wid you on do weather am sar- tin to agree wid you on politicks. It doan’ fuller dat do man who agrees wid you on politicks will feel bound to accept your kind of religion. De fack dat you lend a naybur your shovel (loan' hind him to lend you his wheelbarrow. Bic who looks lor honesty whar’ he finds gray bah-s will be as sadly disappointed as he who argues dat an old coat am de sign of a thief or a beggar. Put faith in human natur’, an’ yet be eber ready to doubt. “ 1 expect to meet about so many mean men in de course of a. y‘al‘. “Iexpect de summer will be hot an’ de winter cold. “ I expect to nave chilblains in December un’ slgakes of (:10 ager in April. “ I expect (131: ‘5. sartink per cent, of dis world’s populashun will lie to me, steal my cabbages, frow stones at my dog au’ hit me Wid a brickbat as I go home from de lodge. “ On de odder hung, when Icome to strike de average, I ken put my hand on men who will lend me money, go on my bond, speak well of me an' sot up all night to protec’ me. “ No man am perfeck. He may strike you at first sight as werry good or werry bad,but doau’ decide until you average him. He may beat a. street kyar company an’ yit be honest: wid a butcher. He may crawl under do can- vas to see a circus, an’ vit pay his pew rent in advance. He may lie to you as to how he woted, an’ yit tell de truf about a spav- ined hoss. He may cuss on (16 street, au’ yit he a tender father at home. He may incour- age a dog-fight,zm’ yit walk a. mile to restore a los’ chile to its parents. “ Accept no man fur his fine talkâ€"reject no man fur his old clothes; stand him out in de sunlight an’ average him. You will be sartin to fln’ sumthin’ bad about him,but you will also be sartin to fin’ sumthin’ good." PETITIONS. Among the thirty-seven petitions record- ed by the Seeretaxy, were two from the Sandwich Islands, accompanied by a request that Givemlam Jones be sent there to organ- ize a lodge and show the poor henighted heathen how to use the whitewash brush. ELECTION. \Vord being passed that Elder Toots had fallen asleep, Sir Isaac Walpole softly took up the bean-box and the list of candidates and passed around the hall. The following candidates were elected in tWelve minutes by the clock: Disparity Smith, Elder De Hoe, Trustee \Valker, Colonel Rambo June, Rev. J eems Brown, Uncle Carter, J udge An- derson and Prof. Hoopsure Sims. MORE HONORS. The Secretary read the following in a voice trembling with emotion. NEW YORK, February 14 ’82 COUNCIL CHAMBER or Tm: GEE-HAW- CLUB. THE LIMEâ€"KEN CLUB Brother Gardner : DEAR SIR,â€"~At our annual conclavc held Monday Evening, February 13, 1882, you were elected an honary member of our No- ble Order, and the title of Doctor of the \Vise Book was conferred on you by a stand- ing vote. After adopting the sunflower, with your portrait painted in the centre, as our emblem for the ensuing year, the meet ing adjourned for one week. Yours very truly K HON. CANISTER JONES, Secretary. The reading of the above was followed with sobs and cheers in different parts of the hall, and it was a full minute before Brother Gardner could reply to the effect that he deeply appreciated the honor and accepted the membership. THE COMING M ACIHEE. The following interesting communication was then announced: MALDEX, M Am, February 1:} 1882. Brother Gardner: DEAR Singâ€"I shall he in Detroit early in March, by a Blue Line freight car, and claim a reward of $25 that you ofTered about a. yem‘ago for the host thingr for itching chil- l)lains. I shall have the machine with me, and With your consent will explain its work- ings before your club. It works down the bootleg, and can be applied to any foot from nine to seventeen inches long. Bijah will be left out in the cold until he gets his feet pared down. I shall at the same time apply 101‘ a, pass through the bean-box, and if smâ€" eesst'ul, shall present to the club my patent self-adjusting, baekaetion, i'urwunl snap chilblain SCI‘fltclleI'. ' ‘he Secretary was instructed to enter in- to correspondence with the New England genius at once and secure the control of the machine for the Middle States. If it works as claimed it will be worth millions of dol- Inn's to the colored race alone. THEY WILL OBSERVF. Hivcadnm Jones ofi'ered the following pre- unihle and resolution : “ ll’ll'ams, George \Vashiugtou was de Father of his kcutry 311’ could not tell a lie; an’ “ W/a‘rmm, De anniverszu'y of his birth should he observed by all good :m’ putroitic citizens, whedcr (lcy kin tell a lie or not; now, daruhn'c. “ 1303011741, Dal. tlc Lime-Kiln Club sot apart xle 22ml as a «lay of feastin’ an’ re- joi " 1' an’ gwine to a dance in do cvenin.’ ” The Rev. l’enstoek moved to strike out the words: “Gwinc to a dance in do even- in’,” and substituting the words: “ Take our way to prayer-meeting in do twilight,” but he was voted down Will a pressure of 200 pounds to the square inch, and the resolu- tion was adopted in its original form. HONORABLE nonoimnms. The Secretary reported the receipt of a. programme for an entertainment to be given by the colored Odd Fellows of Nashville, on the 22nd, :and called attention to the fact that more than twenty of the honorary members of the Lime-Kiln Club in that city were named on the programme, Messrs. Ly- tle and King,the chief orators, together with Yours truly, C. IIEADOFF, M. D. Detroit Free Press the five gentlemen constituting the Commit- tee of Arrangements, was here at the last annual election of ofiicers. SYMPATHY, BUT NO CASH. A communication from William Haver- nip Johnson, of Port Huron, Mich, an- nounced that he was engaged in alaw suit with the gas coil'plel‘] them, and, as anhonâ€" orary member 01 the Lime-Kiln Club, he desired to borrow $500 trom the treasury to carry on the war. Brother Gardner instruc- ted the Secretary 10 reply to the fact that. while the club extended its heartfelt sympa- thy to the member in his hour of trial, it could not loan its cash except on first mortâ€" gage bonds of a trunk line railroad. He was advised to call for a jury, and to get as many of his relations on the panel as seemed con- sistent with the spirit of justice. HE IS A FRAUD. A communication from the Hon. Juniper Smith, of Uolymans, Gn., announced the fact that a colored man callianr himself Pickles Smith, and claiming to be a, member of the Lime-Kiln Club, was in that section of the country peddling a. powder to cure cats and dogs of somnambulism. He claimed that his powder was indorsed by the club and that all moneys received therefor were to be devoted to the erection of a new Para- dise Hall. The Secretary was instructed to post the fellow as an unhung villain and a water roof imposter, and to request the peop e of Georgia not to hold any funeral serviceaover his remains in case he was found dead. THE CLOSE. The janitor announced that both hinges of the hall stove had burned oil", and that there was unmistakable signs of a general collapse. He had used putty, cement, wire and two old liver pads, to hold it together (luring the last month, and the time had now come when he could no longer feel safe. He was instructed not to build a fire at the next meeting, and the members were warned to bring their overcoats and carmufl's. Hot bricks will be prov1ded as far as possible. The hour for closing having arrived, the sleeping Elder Toots received the usual sup- ply of kicks and the meeting adjourned. _.,ia_.â€"N<o.~>w.â€"â€"â€" CURRENCY. It is said that an angle \x‘cx'm cannot dig moxe than one inch per hour, but he is al- ways an inch beyond the shovel when you .nuu -. wait fish bait. Fortune never knocks at a man‘s door at all. She simply offers him some shares in a. “ salted ” silver mine, and if he makes 1L big thing out of it well and good. It has been discovered that the poplartrce is a. natural lightning-rod, and the next thing is to discover how to get one 011 the roof of a house and make it; stay there. Emuious of Richelieu, Lord Lorne wants to establish an Amdvmie Uanadierme of eminent literary and scientific men; but where, it is asked. are the men '2 A Milwaukee girl wants $5,000 damages because she wasn’t quite ready to he kissed when a. man kissed her. He ought to have blown a. 1101-11 or rung a bell and given her thirty seconds’ warning. No one can say why he feels an aversion towardsa man who parts his hair in the middle, but it is a solemn fact that such a man no sooner rises up in a wan] cannun than fifty voices instantly call out : “Sit down, anith!” During a. dearth of news in a Western newspaper office, the office cat was jammed in the job press and the editor immediately set up the following head-lines; DRDAL‘I-‘CL Acvmm'r. NINE LIVES LOST! r “The man who is happy is rich,” says Peter Cooper. Uncle Peter, send on your ducats and take our happiness for the next six months. We want to know how it will seem to be Huh and nxiscx'ahlv. Acnlico ball was recently given in Man- chester to Show what beautiful designs and colors modern skill could product. Nolady was admitted to the ball whose dress was not exclusively of English calico, printed either in Manchestcrm‘ (llusguw, and every one was amazed {Lt 1hr). Maui)" and Variety of the costumes. 'J‘mruuuL m“ John. suppose I were to shoot at a tree with live birds on it, and kil- led three, how mun}; would he left!” Johnâ€" Tln-ee, sir. ’ 'l‘eneherâ€"«“ No; two would be left, you ignorunms.” Johnw” No, there wouldn’t though. The three shot would be left, and the other two Would be flied (“my 1” Teacher; “ Take your seat, John.” OLD SHOES. How much a man is like old shoes, For instance. both a sole may lose ; Both have been tanned, both are made light By (iobhlers. Both get left and right, Both need a mute to be complete. And both are made 1}) go on feet. They both need healing. oft are sold, And both in tlme turn gill to mold. \Vith slices the last is hrst; with men ’I‘heiirst shall be the lust, and when The shoes wear out they’re mended new : When men wear out they‘re men dead, 100. They both are trod upon. and both “'ill tread on others. nothing 10111. 30th havethen‘ ties. and both iurlinv, \Vhen polished, in the world to shine. And but]; peg out â€":rnd would you (-licose To be a man or be his shoes _____â€"-â€"“<0>CQIâ€"â€"â€" \Valking With His Skull Fractured. A very serious accident happened the other day to Wesley \\ ulls, a. young man employed at Hefright's stone quarry at \Varrior Ridge, 3. short distance west of Huntiiigdon. A stone became detached from the side of the quarry, and in its de- scent struck him on the left side of the head, fracturing his skull. He was brought to the borough limits on a handcar, when he walked to the Eagle Hotel, his board- ing-place. After washing himself he went down town to see Dr. P. 1). Miller. Upon examination the doctor saw that \Vall’s skull was badly fractured. and that a deli- cate operation would he re to be performed. They returned to the Engle Hotel, where Dr. Miller, assisted by Dr. A. B. Timin- baugh, removed four pluses of the lower . table of the skull and 10 pieces of the up- 3 per. It was found that :L small piece had penetrated the membrane of the brain. The hole in W'all’s head measured about one and a half by one and a fourth inches, ex- Posing the brain to View. \Valls had been conscious since the accident, and, although. his life may be said to be hanging in the balance, it is not altogether improbable that he will recover. ~