Richmond Hill Public Library News Index

The Liberal, 19 Jun 1884, p. 2

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AGRICULTURAL. Seed Farming and Gardening. According to science and the dictionaries, all grains are seeds, but practical experience frequently shows that the condition in which the former often reach the market renders them unfit for the purposes of seeding. In had years much of the com‘ mercial grain is so injured by heating-that its vitality is impaired, if not entirely destroyed. At the best grains in store- houses are so filled with seeds of weeds as to be unfit for seed purposes. Every year we find good farmers looking for clean seed, willing to pay an extra price for their requirements, which in itself would give a fair profit to the grower. In fact, however cheaply grain or other crops may sell, the farmer has only himself to blame if he fails to receive due remuneration for his labor. If he takes pains to produce the choicest crop he can usually sell at his own p'ice, within reason, among his own neighbors for seed. Why then do not more farmers devote their time and land to seed growing? There is, we are glad to say. increased attention to this branch of the business of farming, and with a corresponding reduc tion in the extraordinary profits that once were common. It shows that good farming, such as seed growing demands, is more generally prevalent now than formerly. But this good farming is itself based on securing pure seeds, and therefore the de‘ mand increases as does the supply. In , fact, we believe that the tendency of the times is to crowd out all farmers who do not use pure seed and grow clean crops. Even for commercial purposes the poor grain is so inferior that there is no profit in it. The law which proclaims the survival of the fittest prevails in farming as it does in all other kinds of business. \Vith regard to many varieties of garden seeds it is probable that they should be more largely grown by farmers themselves than is the case at present. Such a course is accompained by some trouble and exer- tion, but the extra labor required involves an education which helps fit the man for something better. To grow a crop me rely because it requires little care or skill is not only to condemn one’s self to a life of poor- ly paid labor, but to correspondingly impair the character and mental grarp of the indi- vidual. The farmer who pursues a widely diversified industry needs, and has more intelligence than one who confines himself to a. few easily grown staples. W’hen farmers begin by market gardening on a small scale and the growing of choice, pure seeds, their style of farming improves in other respects. They are obliged to he p their land free from objectionable weeds, and quite often they discover that this necessity, instead of being a hardship, is a positive advantage. Very few farmers have facilities {0.- sell ing seed on a large scale at retail prices. If they grow such for market they must do so under contract, and the prices pard are but little in excess of ordinary market rates. Near cities and villages market gardening offers better inducements in the way of profit. It is a curious fact that many in- land towns are upplied with vegetables grown by market parderners on the high priced lands near New York and Bsor. and thence shipped to places that haw not enterprise enough to supply the l-ome dc~ mand. \Vhercver this is me fact there 16 a. field which no time should be ll st in filling. Even where no present derrl n.l appears to exist the production of fun? Vigetables at reasonable rates is sure to create i no. The market once secured urli easily be retained. The route of a dealer in garden vegetables through a city is very like a milk route. Where the g. ois arc sarislaciory. and prices reasonable, customers are rerained :or years. Itisa very sugestive fact that the farmer who once enters upon these branches of farming generally keeps at it as long as he lives; or if he sells out, then the chance of continu- ing the business and securing his old customers is an important consideration, often largely increasing the market value of his land. In one instance, where a new railroad was being run through a town. land taken from seed and garden farms was appraised more than twice as high as land beside it, naturally just as good, devoted to ordinary farm crops. The appraisers acted on the old rule, which generally fixes the value of property, that anything is worth in money that sum upon which its owner is able to make it continuously pay the interest. In this view not only does good farming pay, but it is also essential that those crops be grown which with care and skill may be expected to yield the largest returns from the soil. In this way the farmer who makes his farm bring the most revenue is at the same time increasing its value should he feel inclined to sell.â€" Am. Cultivator. Luminous Plants. There is a sort of fungus called Rhizomor- pha subterranca, which stretches its root like tendrils along the walls and floors of mines, (r ether underground places. These tendrils exhibit lines or‘ light which came a considerable amount of illumination. Who th- er the luminosity is dependent on the pree- sence of oxygen is a disputed point that dies appear to have been determined. If so, it would look like the result of c mbustion, but combustion ever so slow seems in20J- ceivable in so inert a form of plant file; Combustion, of course, goes on in the blood of animals; but even this, comparatively rapid as is, is far below the rate of c mbur- tion necessary to produce light, and it is in~ credible this can be the explanation; for by such rombuetion the tirsue must speedily be consumed unless there were a process of re- pair and renewal entirely unparalleled in the very highest organization. Another form of vegetable light has sug- gested some form of electric action. A daughter of Linnaeus, sitting in the garden as the dusk grew on, noticed a spark or flash amongst some yellow nasturtiums. Her eyes were naturally fixed on the spot, and presently another slight flash raised her wonder to amazement. On going to the flOWerbed she found that the flashes evident- ly procesded from the nasturtiums. (if course, be r father's attention was called t) the phenomen. and he was convinced of HS reality without, however, being able to con- ceive any explanation. The same thing has also been observed in marigolds by another botanist, and in the poppy by a third. As these flowers are .so familiar it naturally occurs to ask why it should be reserved to scientific experts to see such things? But it should be remembered that the luminosity is very slight, momentary, and occasional. M A It is precisely the sort of phenomenon that eludes all but those who are continually on the watch. The observations. however, appear to be so well guaranteed that there is no sufficient reason for doubting them. In all these cases the light is only a momen- tary flash, and is therefore a very drfisrent thing from the steady gleam of insects or funguses. The fact that these flashes have been noticed when the flowers were just in full bloom would seam to suggest that the phenomenon may be connected With fer- tilization. The falling of the pollen on the anthers has been supposed to cause a momentary quickening of life, manifested in a faint flash. But that explains nothing. Of what nature is that flash? The only conjecture is that it is electric, but it is a conjecture only. and there is nothing .more at present to be saidâ€"Sunday M agazme. ITEMS OF INTEREST. Referring to the coming visit of the King of Holland, who was born in Brussels, in 18”, a Belgian paper says: “The church where he was baptized is now a post-othce; the ducal palace, which the States General built for his grandfather, has become the site for academies ; the Castle of Tervueren, also presented, with its splendid park, to his father. is in ruins, burned to the ground, like the old Hotel d'Orange, where he was born.” It seems that the leaders of the ins and outs in England are pretty much of a much- ness in respect to slave-holding antecedents. If Mr. Gladstone father once owned, as it is asserted, 880 slaves, Lord Silisbury’s grandfather and great‘uncle were strenuous upholders of the “African trade,” which. inâ€" deed, found no more vigorous defender than Gen. (lasaoyne, M. P. fer LiVerpool, whose property near that city the Marquis in- befits. Impregnation of the atmosphere of a sick chamber when the patient is ill of diphtheria, measles, scarlet fever, or of any allied (lis- ease, with the odcr of a. mixture of equal parts of turpentine and carbolrc acid is re- commended by llr. Vilandt. Half a tea- spoonful of the mixture Wlll be enough at a. time. if it is near the boiling point. The odor generally gives some relief to the sufferer, and tends to prevent the spread of the malady. M Hillier recently offered to the French Academy of Sciences an account of his ex- periments wrtlr rabim. could caeilyinoculate guinea pig’, rats, etc, Garden and Farm. Provide some old mortar in the hen-yard. Under-draining causes the son] to be cooler in the summer. Tarred paper wrappings injured and killed young ire-3s in a Western orchard. \Vhen on ’y a few fowl are k. pt it is best to renew the stock every year. The best way to use special manures is to sow tthi on the surface after partially fitting the soil, then cultivate and barrow in. Cut common brown wrapping paper into piccas four inches square and wra p around p:ants when pllrrting. It will defend them from cutsworms. Much of the failure with pear trees, in localities supposed to be unfavorul 10 to the growth and bearing of pear trees, is un« doubtedly owing to deficient care and cul ture. Do not, in feeding calves, change too suddeon from one food to another; and give no more than is really eaten. (lllves, like all other young animals, need frequent, rather than lirge feeds. A variety of vegetables is used for fill- ing silos in other countries. ln France beet top) and the leaves of grapes are employed, in England turnip leaves and vetches, and in India diflerent kinds of wild plants. that disiasl. take hydrophobic, and then showing con- this disease. plexion, tacne. back, veil. such as the wo-e. He mueket, and under his mantlea long sword. Dried blood on strawberry land, applied Mohammedans of old between the rows, 400 pounds per acre, in- creased a Kansas crop one third, prolonged the period of ripening, and the unit held its size. Results much better than With common manure. Ecsilage, properly made, says Dr. Hoe- kins, is a good feed, when properly used, as any that was ever devised for feeding dairy cowsâ€"is good as roots, and far less costly ar-d difficult to produce in large quantities up in our Amencm farms. being a fanatic. three children. for use, is thus preparedzâ€"One moderate quantity of hot or cold water. copying paper, in book or other form, or, better, by means of cloth pads saturated with the solution. The pads are placed be- tween any suitable number of leaves and pressure is applied, very moderate at first, in order that the paper may absorb enough of the liquid, and then the pressure is in- creased. The pads having been removed the paper is pressed andis then ready for use. The sheets Will not stick together when thus treated. On May 9 a commercial traveller found 5'4 1.300 as he was getting out of the train at Brussels, which belonged to a German deal- er in horses, who had been travelling in the same compartment, and of whom he fortn- wrth went in search, and met frantically rushing to the station. The worthy Ger- man, with prodigal generosity, ctfercd him a dollar, which the finder declined. “Then,” said the other, "you must at any rate come and dine with me ; I encompass over such a service in this light manner.” The invitation was accepted. The inviting guest appeared on time, but no host was forthcoming, and the guest, as he paid his bill, vowed to abstain for all time forth from favors toward Teutonic dealers in horseflesh. At a. meeting of the Iron and Steel Insti- tute, London, the general introduction of metal sleepers for railroads was advocated by Mr. W. R. Browne. The experience of Germany had shown that the loss by cor- rosion was trifling on much-used roads, and that there was no complaints of "hard- running." \Vebb‘s wrought-iron sleepers proved a success in South Wales. A mem- ber stated that within the last two years 40,000 tons of iron permanent way had been sent abroad by British manufacturers, and that he himself had on hand 111,000 metal sleepers for exportation. Another rm rriber spoke in favor of supersedirm lu'l. r. of every kind by the acOpri-m o -r steel “'1 of 140 pounds to the yard, as he believed that a. rail of this kind was to be the rail of the future. The price of wooden sleepers is even now very close upon that of iron ones, and under very favorable circumstances the life of the farmer rarely exceeds twenty-one years. Scarcely 25 ye irs ago the most powerful piece of artillery was a. 68 pounder, throw- ing its projectile with a velooity of 1,600 feet per second. Now the weights of guns have been increased from 5 tons to 100 tons' the velocities from 1,600 feet to 20, 000 feet per second, the energies from 1,000 foot- tons to over 52,000. and the projectiles from 68 pounds to 2,000 pounds. But enor- mous as these attainments are expressed in figures the highest or greatest areas no- thing when compared. as some one has re- marked, with thoie of the projectiles, vel ocities, and energies existing in nature. Basing the estimates on the principles laid down by Helmholtz. if the earth. for ex. ample, be considered as a huge projectile, and if it could be possible to utilize the whole of the energy stored up in gunpowder, there would be required a charge 150 times greater than its own weight, and 900 times greater than its volume to impart her orbit- al motion to the earth. Salt is being freely used by nurserymen in their pear nurseries for the purpose of counteracting blight. Iron filings and cop- peras in sorution have been used for the purpose. If these remedies do not prevent the disass, they at least correct a disposi- tion to blight. Susiees in raising‘house-plants may be forwarded by using toil, two-thirds of which is garden~soil and the rest sand. It r-hould he kept light and loose about the ruois, and the plants watered only as they appear to need it. “her: any of the leaves wither and fall, instead of throwing them away make little rolls of them and tuck them down in the earth, where they decay. This is the best fertilizer. «M->«.â€"â€"â€" SCIENTIFIC AND USEFUL. Ergotine is the most expensive drug now in the market, and costs nearly $1500 per pound. Rain falling upon a dry soil and moisten- ing it to some depth warms both the soiland the water. The value of the unconsumed coal Which makes the Lindon fcg and smcks is placed at $23,000,000 annually. Mr. Dummer of Kittery. Maine. has in- vented a prouees by which clpp r can be welded as only in l as well as mm. A bag of c‘rarcorl suspended in a c'stern will purify the water, and meat wrapped in a clash and packed in charcoal Will keep fresh for weeks. Java produces a vegetable wool which, freed frciri its leathery covering and the seeds, is worth sixteen and seventeen cents per pound. Potassium bicbromale is commended by Dr. Lanjirrois as a disinfectant for cesspools, sewage, etc., and he thinks it likeley to be of great use in diseases due to microbia. Dr. Bell maintains that in the fat of cheese and fat milk the ratio of soluble lo insoluble fatty acids is the same. He is speaking of real milk, and not a mixture of chalk and water. It is discovered that prussic acid is an anti- dote to strychnine, but it will have to be ad ministered with great care, for the required dos: would itself be fatal but for the presence of the etrychnine. Bread is made on the Devonshire coast of England from a sea grass I’orpliyra. Zaciniata, which is chopped and mixed with a little names]. It will keep from four to eight days, and the people who use it are fond of it. Contrary to the opinions of some eminent chemists, Dr. H. Sti‘uve holds that ll the quality of the albumenoids in cows’ milk and human milk there is no diflerence, but the latter has a smaller proportion of nitro- geneous matter, especially of ~caseine. A towel folded several times and dip ed in hot water and quickly wrung, and app ieu over the seat of the sin in toothache or neuralgia, Will general y afi'ord prompt re- lief. Headaches alrrrost always yield to the simulanteous application of hot water to the feet and back of the neck. W Don’t Hurry. The bustling, hurrying man, as a mattér of fact. is a poor worker. Too much of his steam power is expi rrded in kicking up dust. The habit of hurrying and of feeling in a hurry is fatal to good work, and diminishes the amount of Work a good man can accom- plish. The men who accomplish most never seem in a. hurry, no matter how much the have to do. They are not troubled for lac k of time, for they make the most of the min- utes by working in a. cool, methodical man- ner, finishing each job properly, and not ex- pending their nervous lorce in bustle. Sys- tem will accomplish more than misdirected energy. The Monileur Oriental of ConstantinOple quotes from an Arabic paper, El Zaman, some interesting items of information con- cerning that curious personage the Mahdi, from which We extract a few items ,â€"“The Mahdi is very tall and thin, his complexion is ruddy brown, his eyes large, his nose thick ; he has also thick lips, and very large fingers. He has eighteen wives; his fol lowers and servants are fully convinced that their master is the mightiest sovereign in tho .wor‘ld. He never undresses, even when he goes to bed. His clothes consist of a broad red garment, over which he Wl-‘al‘Sll. green manilc bordered with red. His head is crowned with a turban, over which a. white veil is thrown. In his hand he always comes a rosary ofa thousand ivory beads. On rising he appears very serious, and, instead of coffee, drinks a great glass of date wine. [He then goes to put into a krttlc of water kept He found that he With liVill‘uphllL and all hrs en. es died with llrt the ervant, a‘ccnliog to the report, Wound up his remnrkr by first provng that it was lmp)SSlille for fowrs to clusively that they are the only animals who have over been known to recover from The Mahdi’s famous lieutcnant, Urman Dlgma, is described by one of his soldiers lo he of tall and slender build, with pale com- large open eyes, and a line mous- Eis countenance expresses courage and energy ; he is almost always on horse- and wears over his left shoulder a generally carries a, very long It is reported that he is Very pious, without He has only one wife and Copying paper, always damp and ready pound of chloride of magnesium is dissolved in a The solutron is applied witha brush to the market, sits in front of a booth, and there dispenses justice. All complaints and petitions are brought to him, and, havrng inquired into them, he intrusts his vekyl with the execution of his decision. Ha then returns home, where his attendants receive him in state, and burn incense before him. After he has prayed, his dinner is served. at which more than two thousand people take part. Among the gut szs appear many Europeans wearing the turban.” m->«'â€"â€"â€"â€" Petrified Logs. The United States snag boat. Tocoi, re- turned to the Sivannah River a f:w days ago, where she is having some of her much irrery overhauled. She was, until a couple of weeks arm. employed in clearing out the Altamaha River. from it; mouth to the Oconee RiVer. The Tocoi is of comparative- ly light draft, but one of the most powerful boats of her class in the government service. She was furnished with a good supply of dynamite cartridges. and an electric bat- tery. which were found efficacious for the WOrk she undertook. A la'ge number of rocks, many projecting pieces of raft timber, besides several large trees, were removed from the channel, so that the river is quite clear for timber rafts and light draft steamers. Among the obstacles to navigation which the Tocor encountered, Were a. number of petrified trunks of trees, heavier than the largest stones that were taken from the bot- tom of the river. Abovt thirty miles up the river from the Sivannah, Florida and Western railway bridge, a large gum tree formed an obstructionâ€"over twenty years ago. This huge trunk has broken up sever- al very valuable rafts of timber that were being floated t) Darien, and has directly and indirectly, caused a great deal of annoy» ance to all persons who Were interested in the business ;on the river. There is a bend Where the obstruction lay, and the locality came to be familiarly known among the peo- ple as the “Scooping Gum Bend.” Here the raftmen were always in dread expecta- tion of having the timber in their charge “scooped in,” or broken up by contact with the obstruction referred to, and carried rapidly out of their control by the current, which flows very swiftly at this point. When the Tocoi undertook to lift this sunken tree from the river bed. it was dis- covered that a m ouster of no insignificant proportions and weight, had to be dealt with. The powerful engines and tackle of the boat were found unequal to the task, and hence the obstruction had to be broken vp with dynamite, and the pieces iaken up separately. The entire trunk had been completely petrified. and was as heavy as iron. One of the pieces was estimated to weigh about seventy tons. Some of the fragments were exceedingly beautiful, being of different colors â€" some black, others crimson and violet, and others contrasting shades. About Seine Curious Locks and Keys. In the middle ages locks for churches and cathedral doors were often rare specimens of art metal work. Eliborate scrolls, the images of saints. and other ambitious eflorts of the true artisan of those days, entered into the design of locks which were 1‘ ally an ornament to the magnificent doors and cabinets of those times. A design for the escutcheon cur." ridding the keyhole fre- quen'ly hail the figurrs of two guardian ridge-ls With outspread wings. Licks of very curious construction, known as "Apostle locks.” were also common in med~ fin val times. These locks had on the front the figure of one of the Apistles, and on touching the hand of the figure the bolt flew back. In the reign of Queen E1123- beth one Mark Scalist, a smith, constructed a lock consisting rf eleven pieces of iron, steel, and brass, all of which, with a pipe key. weighed only two grains of gold, The great inventor, the Marquis of Worcester, who flourished in the reign of King Charles 1., devised alock containing asteel birb. which was perfectly harmless so long as the right key was used, but if a wrong key was inserted the barb sprang through the key- hole, and “caught the hand of too intruder as atrap catches afox." It is said that While the inventor was experimenting with this curious lock he was scarcely nimble enough in removing his hand, and was caught in his own trap. At Willenhall, in Staffordshire, which is the great seat of the lack trade, silver padlockr the sides of which are much smaller than a threepenny piece, are still made, and are quite perfect in their mecnanicism. Locks containing single bells, and own chimes, which sounl an alarm when tampered with bya false key. are among the modern curiosities of the trade. Common padlocks are largely made for the natives of India and Africa. at VValsall. A lock and key co'riplete are sold by the maker for a half-penny, and merchants abroad state that many of the natives string these locks together so as to form necklets, and wear them as “charms.” The Monk’s Lesson. There was once an old monk walking through a. forest with a. scholar by his side. The old man suddenly stopped and p)inted to four plants that were cluse at hand. The first was just beginning to peep ah we the ground, the secrnd had rooted itself p etty well into the earth, and the third was asmall shrub. while the fourth and last was a full- sized tree. Then the monk said to his young companion : “Pull up the first.” The boy easily pulled it up with his fingers. "Now pull up the second.” The youth obeyed, but not 3 l easily. “And the third." The boy had to put forth all|his strength and us: both arms before he succeeded in nprooting it. "And now,” said the master, “try your hand on the fourth.” But lo 1 the trunk of the tall tree, grasped in the arms of the youth, scarcely shook its leaves, and the lit- tle fellow found it impossible to tear its roots from the earth. Then the wise old monk explained to the scholar the meaning of the four trials. “This, my son, is just what happens with our passions. When they are very young and weak one may, by a little watchfulness over sell and the help of a little self-denial, easily tear them up ; but if we let them cast their roots deep down into our souls, than no human poWer can uproot themâ€"the Almighty hand of the Creator alone can pluck them out. For this reason, my child, watch well your first irn- pulses." â€"â€"‘OHOW~â€"' The esteem of wise and good men is the greatest of all temporal encouragmieuts to virtue, and it is a mark of an abandoned spirit to have no regard to it. CALLS AMONG OUR EXCHANGES, "Oh, mamma," said little l’aul, when the new baby was shown him for the first time, “can I wear baby's dresses when I gi>w tall enough?” The "picnic pie" is the latest. Its dis- similarity from the ordinary common run of pies permits it to be usel as a cushion until dinner time. "Will the coming man be happier?" asks a writer. It depends to a great extent upon Whether his wife has got tired and gone to sleep or is still waiting up for him. The question which agitates the fashion- able houaewrre at present is not so mich “\thre shall we go this Summer? ‘ as it is “\Vnere shall we make the neighbors think we have gone?” Caution: A lady ninety years old remark- ed to M. de Fontenelle, whose age was eighty-five: “Death has forgotten us.” “Hush!” said M. do Fontanelle, putting his finger to his lips. “Don't you remember me?" asked the soda water clerk of a lady customer. “No, I cannot say that I do,” she replied. “dill yet there is something familiar about your fizz ” Dumas file is sometimes severe: The con- versation had turned on Mrs. Xâ€"â€", who had been very beautiful. “She was some- thing of a. goddess,” said a. faithful admirer. “Yes,” said Dumas, “of anziq iity.” A Wise man says “the most powerful kings in the world are wor-king and thin- king." Bless your simple hear-t, man, old four kings will knork the pair of them out so quick they'll wonder What they ever stain in for. Miss Risebuil, who took part in amateur theatricalsâ€""Oh, I’m so tired; I had to stand all the evening.” Miss Sharp, who was in the audienceâ€""My dear, you have not had to stand nearly as much as we have.” They talk about "the wisdom of the ser- pent,” forgetting appare-nt'y, that it didn’t require so very much sapiency to beguile one poor. unprotected woman, whose mind had never been disciplined by shopping or house keeping. "Look here. This piece of meat don't suit me. :’s from the back of the animal's neck," said a. Toronto man to a German butcher. “Mine lren’, all dot beef vet I sells is back of dot neck. Dare vas nodding but horns in front of dot neck." If it were as polite to ask an amateur sing- er not to sing any more as it is to ask him to sing in the first place, there would be less weariness of the spirit in the world, and fewer persons would go into private parlors carrying concealed weapons. Getting solid with the dog: "Do you know the J acksons?” asked a lady’of ayoung man who lived in their neighborhood, “No, I’m not personally acquainted with all the members of the family," he replied, “but I always speak to the dog at the front gate as I go past.” , “I have no fear of the future,” remarked a harmless youg simpleton. "You should not be too confident,” replied Deacon Smith; ‘ from late developments in New York and elsewhere it appears fireproof flats cannot be depended upon in this world. I: may be the same in the next." “Hello, Simmons. you look gloomy." “Yes, git dyspepsia the worst way.” "\Vhy, I thought you went to keeping house last week.” “So I did.3nri tune what’s the matter.” “Why don't you let your wife do the cooking?’ “1‘ha:’s just what she is doingâ€"you see she's a graduate of the cooking school." A Mississippi man who writes for a runa~ way Wife describes her as having " high cheek bones, upper front teeth out. crippled in one foot, cross-eyed, and quick~spcken.” One cannot help wondering why the nus- band didn’t run away ins:ead of the Wife. He certainly had provocation enough. The complaint of the mediocre man: “bro,” said the actor, “I don't say as the critics have ever said anything unkind about my acting; but, to tell you the truth, it is somewhat monotonous to find myself contin- ually included among ‘the rest of the char‘ acters' who ‘do not call for special men- tion." Jones-“Now you have had a great deal of experience keeping house on a smill in- come, and know all about how to economize, don’t you?" Smithâ€"“I should say I did.” Jonesâ€""Well. now, there’s a. giorl fellow; but tell me what you have found the cheap- est light to go to bed by." Smithâ€"“Moom light.” “George,” said a girl to her beau the other night, “here is a piece in the paper headed ‘Kismet;‘ what do:s ‘kismet’ mean?” I‘The word must be pronounced with the ‘t‘ silent, Nettie." replied George. “Why, that w0uld be ‘kiss me,” said Nettie. "With the greatest pleas ire,"replisd George And he did. “My dear fellow." said a critic, after ex- amining a painting by his artist friend, “do you not see that you have pinned that an- gel s robe together with a gold brooch? Who ever 81W an angel with a brrich?” Artist, after a moment’s reflection: “True, but who ever saw an angel without a bronco?” Gri- tic silenced, but feeling that he had not stated his one prop arly. “L"za, why didn’t yer let Bill Thomson take yer horns fro n the ball laq’ night?” “K188, Moll; he done gone an‘ showed his- se'f a co lvard, that’s why. “And how did he do (let, Lize?‘ "Why he had two razors in his pockets, an’ I says dat enny follow whut carries mure'n one razor to a ball wid him am a coward and ain't no gen'leman, I does." “ Guess you’re about righ Lize.” Guestâ€"“I did not know you had a band here." Lindlordâ€""Oh, yes, I have one every season." Guestâ€"“How often do the play?" Landlordâ€"“Only once a dayâ€"in the afternom or evening." Guest- "VVouldn’t it be better to have them play in the morning?” Landlord~"\Vhy in the morning?" Guestâ€"â€""Because then the guests, rested, refreshed and invigorated by a good night's sleep, are better able to stand it.” “Mary, I want a messenger to send down town,” said a lady to her maid; “the sales- lady has sent me the wrong bundle and I want to inform the forelulv of her careless- nesss. Is there any one dis rrgaged?" “i think not, uu'am; the clnrriber laly is busy with her rooms and the kitchen lady has Visitors, h(r' mother, the washer lady, and her cousin the ash grntleuiau, having call- ed. But perhaps the foot gentleman, or the coach gentleman is disengaged. I will see.”

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