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The Mysteries of Sleep The mystery of alerp is one with wh'ch We have become famiainr through long cu;- (luaintanceship. “To forgot that it 18 as greats. marvel as death More than xhzt, the cxperiunce of seeing gorgeous pageants Spreau before 1min thugs periodo of quida canoe, of being delighted by swcet sounds and sights, or terrified by goblins, is a calm- ly accep'ed one. Dzwms, like the growth of the. plant. from the need, are not; often fooi for wondermvnb, simply bgeause wo are no accustomed to them. The Natima/ IUâ€" Mew, in considering the general subject, draws attention to the fact that the dreamer in possession of all his senses describes his drgam as depending upon that of sight. “Behold! We were binding shewea to- gether, and lo / my sheaf arose and stood Ipright; and behold" your shaves stood round about." In thatmost famous vision upon record, Jacob saw the ladder upon which angels ascended and descended. The dreamer in the harvest-field of Canaan, three thousand yam-«S ago, declared,â€" ViDiikés Vifir'his psdaca belzolds new tables spread with a thousand duinties; Lazarus scrfirthe very dogg thafi lick‘egl his sores. Shakespeare, in the vision of Clarence, presents a. succession of pictures to the eye, and when Dido dreams of her lost xEueas, it is to the sense of vision that his image ad- dresses itself. u “If I dream,” Bald a. blind man, “that I am in the basket-shop where I work, I know I am there by the size of the room, the length of it.” It is clear that whatever comes to the blind man must come by touch or hearing, without a gleam of fancy or imaginition. Yet if questioned, he will tell you fhat he has just as much imagination as other people, and dreams quite as often as they do. “Tue impression of the place is with me ; I feel I am there. Sometimes I dream that I am walking in the fields ; I tread on the grass, I smell the freah air.” While Farmer Themas Kendrew was drivâ€" ing from chan_t9n_to h_i_a fgrrghouse in M05- “I often dream,” said ablind boy, “about people. I dream of my brother. I know he in there ; I hear his voice ; I am in the places where we used to be before he died.” “But how do you know you are in a. cer- taiprlaqe '2" o )W one night lately after he had sold a load ofiproduce, three highw ey men sprang out of'a thicket near where the road pitches down asteep hill. One of them seized the horses by the hits, a second grabbed the farmer by the arm and undertook to pull him out of the wagon, while a third hit him on the head. The blow did not stun him, however, and when he had pulled off his overcoat and freed his imprisoned arm, he found that the robber who had struck him had got into the wagon. Kendrew then seized his whip and struck the horses with all his might, and the robber at their heads was thrown head over heels into the ditch. The horses ran down the hill at a terrible gait, followed for a short distance by the secfi ond highwayman who yelled at the one in the wagon :. Now, What mu 1; be the dreams: Pf those who have been blind from birth 2 Since they have never beheld a real object, how shall the brain conceive of one ‘2 “But how can you judge as to the size or leggy} of_wh&t y9u_ cgnnot see Yt' “When I dream,” said ablind hamper, “It’s jest the same as I am now; I dream 01 hearing and touching. The last; dream I had was about a blind chap that’a in prison just now. I went into his wife’s houseâ€"I know it was here by the sound of my foot in it, and Whether it was clean or dirty. As we sat aâ€"talkkng, I heard a voice at the door, and I said,â€" “All this,” said the dying man, “may be enough for you, but it is not; for me ; What relation is there between His handiwork and God? The World eternal ! Time, matter, space, are but a point. God of Newton, give me liglzyt.’ “ “Oh, the sound tells me pretty well. I am in my own old place Where I work.” “You sit on your own box, then '3" “Yes, Itamh it, and if the dream goes on, I get my tools out.” " ‘Halloo !' said I, ‘is that you?’ And I [00].: him by the sleeve; it was his shirt- sleeve I felt, and I was half~afraid of him, and surprised he was out weeks before his time.” "It is, therefore, not with the blind man s: with the rose of the world, that in dreams the senses wake to keener, swifter inteili- gence ; his visions exist as a mere string of mglfe qr less vague and faipt impressions. “ ‘Bless' me, if that ain’t John 1‘ But he took no notice. u “If,” said he, as he lay dying, “you would have me believe in a God, I must feel Him." “Touch, then, your own frame,” was the answer, “and find God there in His noble handiwork.” Having never seen a definite image, he cannot comprehend one, even in his waking moments. Hence arises a tendency to seep- ticism, Which leads him to doubt the exist~ ence of things he cannot touch, as in the case of Nicholas Saunderson, one of the most gifted blind man thaheve; lived. 7 “ Cthe the old devil to death, or crack his skull.” Meanwhile a. struggle had begun between Farmer Kendrow and the desperado in the wagon. The robber tried to knock the far mer out of the wagon, but the farmer grab- bed his arms and forced him down on his knees. By this time the horses had reach- ed the bottom of the hillbndiwere running as fast as ever over 9. level stretch of road. The desperado realized that his companions were too fer behind to be of any assistance to him and that the farmer would be too much for him unless he could suddenly disable the latter, and so by a. desperate effort be loos- ed his arms and attempted to hit Kendrew on the head with a_slun_gshot._ He missed Kendrew’s head, but hit him on the shoulder instead, and then the farâ€" mer got behind, the highwayman, grabbed his arms with a viselike grip rushed him to the hind end of the wagon‘ and pitched him out on the frozen ground. The horses were still running, but they kept in the road and when Farmer Kendrew had disposed of the highwayman he crept out on the tongue. got hold of the reins, and quieted the eni- mais down to a trot. KendreW Eiwss only slightly bruised, and he said next day that it was a. mighty lucky escape. AFreahman wrote home to his father: “Dear papaâ€"I want a. little change.” The parent replied: “Dear Charlieâ€"Just wait for it. Time brings change to everybody. Struggling with Robbers. Tm, DHUNKARD'S NOSE. One of the mom bezmtiful features of the face is a. shap’ly.‘ fine curved nose V” " deformecl, Ema whole face 92 iuju . evm‘ perfect otherwise. Hint 1.x baa J in the p wrtéon of every habitual tipplnz'. 1:; takes on a. hated red (more inie‘vse an 12H». yem‘a go on), becomea coarse with pimpin.s or uwells nut withwi‘ah disgusting and xiViG protuberancesâ€"-“ teddy blossoms,’ is: the apt and picturesque language of the cammon people The tippler may try ever 30 ham , ___-...‘ L. .... '.vv‘ :ngéxilcefi his hagits, butrhis'noae is an em- blazoned signal, proclaiming the fact to evgy newcgmer: . .un ML, A1_x.,L._l . u. , .. The explanation is this : The alchohol increases the action of tho hen-t and arterâ€" ies abov‘: one fifth, thus driving the blood to thc' “.urface faster than the veins can brim; a back Hence the countless capfllarles‘ wh -a minutenosa makes them nmmally invlaible, are distended with impure bloode are kept in a state of pvrmamnt congestion, and give rise to pimples and blotahes. , LLN 12-1.-..A- Says the Medical Reporter, “ It is a medi- cal fact that as the influence of alchohol red- dons the dram-drinkers’ nose, and changes its appearance, no it reddens and changes the appearance of every organ 0! the body ; and as the nose thus effected in not ins. natural or healthy condition. so every or- gan of his body is changed from :a natural and healthy condition to an unnatural and diseased condition; and as the skin of the nose takes on unhealthy actlon, so the sub- stance and coverings of the internal organs take on diseased action, which results in the full development of incurable diseases, such as insanity, diseases of the heart, Bright's disease of the kidneys, hobnail liver, and slow inflammation of the stomach. All. these diseases exist at the same: time in the dramâ€"drinker, but the organ most diseas- ed is apt to take the lead in the morbid action.” Biff, the nose is not alone in its dishonor and mil-bring. Every organ of the body is in a similar condition. The head the-n fore aches ; the sleep is disturbed ; the. appratite is poor ; the liver is disordered ; the tongue is coated ; tha throat is dry ; the heart has spells of palpitfitihn ; the buck and limbs suffer irtquont pains ; and the lungs be- came inflsmed from the slightest exposure This is not a mere deformifiy, nor simply a. prominent sign of a. degrading habit ; it is a. note of warning to its possessor that his whole) system is diseased, and is get-ting ready ior a drunkard a grave. -- .. “7‘ . 1: How A CIGAR MAY COMMUNICATE DISEASE. A man of information was smoking -nd chatting with a physician on o Hudson Riv- er forryboat when a stranger stepped up ancl asked for a light. “ Let me give you 0. match,” replied the man of letters, adding, after his petitioner had Withdrawn, “ I don’t know how you feel about it, doctor, but for my part I very much dislike to put the end of my cigar back into my mouth after it has been fingered by Tom, Dick, or Harry. I always carry matches with me, and make it a point to offer one instead.” “ And quite right you are,” said the doctor. “ I believe that some of the worst diseases can be con- veyed by one to another through Lthe con- tact of his fingers with a borrowed cigar. I personally know of a case whero vsrioloi’i was transmitted by means of a two-dollar bill, and I firmly believe that varioloid and things much Worse can pass from a. man’s fingers into a. cigar, and then into the smo- ker of it.” It is said that in California cigars are manufactured by leprous Chlmmeu ; the idea is utartling ! For ordinarv nervous toothache, which is caused by the nervous system being out of order or by excessive fatigue, a' hot bath Will so sooth the nerves that sleep will na- turally follow, and, upon getting up, the patient will feel very much refreshed and the toothache gone. For what is known as “ jumping” toothache, hot, dry flannel ap- plied to the face and neck is very effective. For common toothache, which is caused by indigestion, or by strong, sweet acid or any- thing’u'very not or cold in a decayed tooth, a little piece of cotton, steeped in strong cam- phor or oil of cloves, is a good remedy. Care in the diet, especially when the bowels are disordered, is helpful to mitigste tooth- ache. If the tooth is much decayed, nothing is better than its extraction. N. J., two and one-half years ago. There has been a bitter feeling between him and the family of Peter Rock, the wealthiest colorei man of the neighborhood. One Sun- day last summer Mr. Hammett was making some statements from the pulpit regarding “Children’s Day,” and Mr. Rock arose from his pew and exclaimed: “That that ain’t the rule.” Mr Hammett ordered Mr. Rock to sit down, but Mr. Rock walked toward the pulpit exclaiming : “I don’t allow no man to tell me to sit down.” Mr. Hammett informed Mr. Rock that if he approached another step he would knock him out. Mr. Rock retired. The Rev. Elijah Hammett took charge of the A. E, Zion VChrurch of Macedfionia, Last Monday was the opening night of the church fair. On Thursday evening Mr.‘ Hammett accused some of the men connect- ed with the cigar and temperance drinks counters with not having turned in the proper amount of money. About ten min- utes later he was informed that a gentleman wished to speak with him out on the steps in front of the church. He went out and was confronted by Charles and Peter Rock, sons of old Peter Rock. They, and others who joined them, abused and threatened the minister. He backed into the church and they followed him up the aisle to the pulpit platform. Here the minister put his hand in his breast pocket and said. in a loud voice, “Come another step at your peril.” Several knives and pistols were out now. Peter Rock, J r., made a lunge for the dominie, and quicker than a Wink his Reverence Whipped out a self~acting 42‘calibre pistol and sent a bullet inte Peter Rock, J r.’s, thigh, The other assailants departed in great haste. ‘ a Peter rock, Sr., got an officer, and they took his Reverence into custody. He was locked up in the county jail at Freehold un- til Friday, when he was released on bail. Chan Rock, Peter Rock, J r., Wm. Dickin- son, and a. man named Michell are in the county j Lil awaiting trial. “I don’t fear no man,” said the pastor yesterday. “I am ready for them, and will let them know that ’oause a. man’s a preach- er they can’t cut him up.” A Pistol Shot From The Pulp_i_t. RELIEF FOR TOOTHAOHE HEALTH Forty years:- agu 93 Dev cant. of 9.11 marri- ug s in En: 19.an m1 “"193 tuck place in the hm chem of the E-smbiiuhuu‘ut. Lu.th yen, nuc "\ng my tip Import; of rh» Ragintear- Gz m :a‘ thv'a proportions elsewhere than in Hm churches: has ri: en from 7 to 30 per went, PM outragmns I'm quanty of" aenta'ncas i0 Engla. :4 has; givm rise to thp nugaestion that a Board 09 R: vision, consisting of retir- ei J11 g v, should mewt o (m {L Week, and submit; their repnri; to the Ham 1 Secretary mumh y of cases in which they deem interâ€" ferwue desirable, Thu efiee‘ive strength of the German army for tha budgetary year 1885 86 is put down at 18.150 uflicals, 427.274 men (in- cludevvg 51,413 non-comnnsntuzmed ($083!) 1,686 pllwsicrans. 783 paymastevs, 619 veter- inary surgeons, 93 saddSers. 81 773 horses. It is now known that Queen Victoria refil- ly wrote to the German Emperor entreating him to usehis influence in favor of the broth- er of hi! latest Benin-law, Prince Alexvnder 0t Bulgaria. This is strange, considering that he is by no means an object; of solici- wde at the courb of Berlin. Am 5112 the Germanspeaking universities that; 17f Vienna has the largest madical fac- ulty, the number of profevsors and other teacheru being 134. B 11in has 100 instruc- tmr and Munich 42, The (smallest is that of Roatock, with 11 teachers ; but even thare an inatruator is provided for every eight or nine studentn, there being but 92 m-séina! schaiara in the univenity. Some English clergyman of the Estab- llflhed Church get for thonuelves but lit- tle of their lnccms from their liVIngafi In the case of a. benefico worth £1,262 per an- num, the varinus deductions for rAtes, taxes expenses for collecting rents, annual repay- ment for loan from the Queen Anne's Boun- ty Fund, brought the total down to £742 ; and if, out of that, the unhappy parson paid the stipends: of four assistant clergy, his in- come would fall to just £45. .. .. n. 1- u As almost evexy member of the English Csbmet is a peer or relative of one, it may he interesting to see what peers and their re- latives haw received from the state between 1859 and 1884. Dukes, £9 7601000; mar- quises, £8,305,950 ; earls, £48,181,202. These Me large sums, and no ten thousand families of those who areflnot peers have received one hundredth part of the amount It may be an excellent plan that the em cutive should be in the hands of the aristocracy, but cheap ii is not. These Brshmins know how to take care of themaelves and their relatives. A writer in the English Illustrcciwl Maga- zine says there is no such thing as debate in the House of Lords in the sense that: it ex- ists in the Commons. The number of peers Who are successful in making themselves heard might be counted on the fingers of b0th hands, but these, happily, are the members whose opinions are looked for. \Vhen Lord Salisbury, Lord Granville, and perhaps a. couple of of peers not sitting on the flout benches have spoken members just leave the house, and if any outsider wants to make a. speech he finds himself without an audience and so desists. Admirers of Shakespeare will read with interest that by order of the trustees of the British Museum, a photograph has been taken of the original deed of mortgage by William Shakespeare and others to Henry Walker of Landon, vintner, of a. dwelling house at Black-friars, dated March 1], 1612-13, with autograph signature of the great poet. Accompanying the deed is a. letter of Albany Wallis to led Garrick, atatirg that the document had been found among the title deeds of an estate of Black- frim‘e, bel 113mg to the Rev. Mr. Father- stonhaugh of Oxford, who presented itto Garrick, April 18, 176%. u- .v 1, 1 ,u" m...-.-_, _nr__, ,, In a recent speech in his cathedral city the Archbishop of Canterbury, alluding to the preposterous nolzionu prevalent among the peasant] y in England as to the advan- tages they are to reap from diaestabliahment said : “ There is a parish Where there is a devoted clergyman, whose family are con- stant in their attention to the sick and sor- rowing. One of them discovered that many of the cottage“ she visited were in favor of disestahlisnment. She asketi several 'VVhy‘Z‘ but could get no answer. At length a. man said, Well, mum, I know it’s a pity, but it would be very convenient to have a cow. “'6 do want a cow, mum.’ ” In St Gil< s a House, the ancestral home of the Earl of Shaftesbury, there is a monuâ€" ment to which the late owner could hardly tlon without emotion. This is a large bust of the Earl. “ Presented to Emily, wife of the seventh Earl of Shaf’cesbury, by the opera- tives of the manufacturing districts of the north of England, as a token of their esteem and regard for the pereevering and success- ful efforts of her noble husband in promot- ing by legislative enactment a. limitation of the hours of labor of children. females and young persons employed in mills and factor- ies. Aug. 6, 1859.” On this occasion 7,000 persons are said to have kissed the Earl’s hands. The London Athenarum states that the story of G oldsmith’s arrest bv his landlady and Johnson,s sale of the “ Vicar of \Veke- field ” are in danger. It is impossible that this account received from Johnson I‘ in self should not be substantially true 2 yet in his introduction to Mr. Stack’s new facsimile of the first edition, Mr. Austin Dobson shows that it will have to be reconciled with certain inconvenient fBCiH. lie holds that the book as early as the 28th of October, 1762, became the property of three persons, one of whom was Benjamin Collins, the Salisbury printer. This exonerates M rs. Fleming, Goldsmith’s Islington landlady. from her traditional reputation for asperity as Goldsmith, at that date, had not gone to Islington ; and it fixes some time anterior to October, 1762, for the composition of the book, which was a. point hitherto in some obscurity The fees of extra Royal Knights of the Garter, as paid by the treasury, and also the bill for the insignia and robes, amount to about $4,500. The insignia are always given with the understanding that when the Knight dies they are to be returned, but they rarely are. When the late cz 1r d ed, his insignia were given up a member of the royal family, who retain them, alâ€" though he had :7 set of his own. There is an understanding that when a member of the English royal family dies, his representatives can keep the insignia. of the garter, if they pay the value, so that they are usually re- turned, but the Queen kept Prince Albert’s. The insignia of an ordinary Knight are al- ways returned after his death, and the cus- tom is for his successor to deliver them to the Queen at a. special audience. FQREIGN ECHOES. A Night 0! Torr-er on a 101mm? in Saginaw Buy. It ins been definite]; useert Line-cl that the propeile) Oeursto, Capt, G. \V. MoGregor, was lost in Saginaw Buy The Oeuuto left Oscadu on Friday. Duo. 4. at 4 o‘clock in the afterno having on bJ-rrrsl tWentytwo unseengors and a. CI’UW of ma Dry-five men She Very soon after (normal. ed a. terribie gale; with snow. The see brake over constantly. The starboard bulwarka Were s ove in. and all the upper railingsc two of the life'floats, and all the light freight on the hurricane deck were washed away The sea. became so hesvy that the vessel could not make any headway against it, and the oflicers 1033: their bearings soon after night set in, Finally a light was sighted, Every- body took it for the Towns harbor In feet, it was the Charity Island light. The Cap- tain at once headed the ship for the ehtranoe, as he supposed to Town harbor. The next minute came a. terrible shock. and the lights about the ship were extinguished. The ship had grounded in about six feet of water. As soon as the» vessel struck a number of horses and some cattle which were confined on the main deck broke from their atalls and went galloping and tumbling about the (leeks greatly augmenting the danger, The p.13- sengers and many of the crew were so badly frightened as to be incapable of doing any- thing to ave themselves, Charles Brown, a. colored cook, died from fright. Others of the crew, in spite of the darkness and con- fusion, began dealing out the life preservern. Contrary to expectations, the ship held together through the night. At daybreak they iound that they were about a. mile from the shore. Signals of distress were hoisted, and éhe stenmer’s whistle was set ageing. At 10 o’clock the lighthousekeeper and his assistant were seen on the beach. A small metallic lifeboat was got over on the lee side, and in it five men went ashore. They found the place barren, but there were two empty fish huts near by, and the boat was sent back and forth until all the passengers and crew were landed. Twe ladies and a child were taken direct to the lighrkeeper’s house, and the men began keeping house in the fish huts. '1'he body of Brown, the cook, was taken ashore and buried‘ Enough food to last for a week or two was saved from the wreck. Frank Pelper, first assistant engin- eer, and six others started for the shore in a yswl. Peiper described their trip next day. He said : We took aboard a. compass, two bushels of salt, and some provisions. We started in the midst of cake ice. Every minute or two the spray would dash over us and freeze as it struck. When we got within four miles of Caseville we found that the ice was frozen solid, yet; was not strong enough to walk upon. We hoisted our storm signal, and began cutting our way with sxes. Two boats started out: to help us, but could not reach us. To add to our dismay, we found that the solid ice, detached from the main shore, was increasing in thickness every minute, and that it was drifting down the bay, taking us with it] We cut, pushed, rowed, and. struggled like mad, reaching the shore at last at 6 o’clock Monday evening, eight miles below Caseville, having drifted that far in the ice. Eight more of the shipwrecked crew and passengers reached Tawas, Mich, next after- noon. They left the Oconto at 1 o‘clock Thursday afternoonin a yewi. At the time of leaving they had heard nothing of the seven members of the crew who left for shore on Monday in a. yewi. The thirty- four persons remaining on the island have enough to eat; but are all very downhearted. All are in the shanty except Capt. McGrc g- or, the first engineer, and one passenger, who are an the boat. The steward, mute, and six passengers walked from Point Look- out to East Tawas, and are completely pro- trated. An immortal utterance of Lord Randolph Churchill’s on seed potatoes illuminated : nd gladdened the 86581011 at, if we remem- ber rightly, 1881. The occasion of its deliv- ery was peculiar. The Government were anxious to bring on a certain Radical motion to which the more active of 1he Consera- tive party were zealously opposed. On a Certain occasion nothing stood between the Government and this motion but another motion with regard to seed potatoes for Ireâ€" land, and the Government fondly hoped that they had squared all the supporters of this motion by promising to accept it gif it were allowed to pass :by undiscussed. But the Government reckonrd without Lord Randolph Churchill. At half past ton on that memorable evening he entered the House and grasped the situation. There were two hours to be disposed somehow or other before the fetal half past twelve, af- ter which the Radical friends of the Govern- ment could bring forward their motion. Lord Randolph Churchill was alone, but Lord Randolph Churchill was not dismayed. He could find no allies, but he rose with un- daunted mien, and began to address the House on the great and comprehensive sub- ject of potatoes. Lord Randolph’s Potato Speech. Never, perhaps, since the days when an obese Irish member gladdened the heart of Mr. Speaker by a description of the person- al charms of a cousin of his, wee the House of Commons more delighted or more dismay- ed. Lord Randolph Churchill gave a clear, but not too brief, description of all the va-. rieties of seed potato known to agricultural men. He displayed an intimate acquaint- ance with the intricacies of the cooking of potatoes which might have gladdenod gthe shade of Soyer himself. Those who listened to Lord Randolph as he calmly and dispas- signater harangued the assembled Senate felt as if a very encyclopedia of potato knowledge was being poured upon their as- tonished senses. The minutes crept into half-hours, and the half-hours into hours, and still Lord Randolph harangued, still poured forth his apparently unfailing flow of knowledge on this highly favored tuber. At last, just as the hand of the clock crept towards the inevitable half-hour after mid- night. Lord Randolph, taken a fresh breath, announced ina cheery tone of voice to the Speaker and to the House that he had come to the most interesting and most important part at his subject, the discussion of a seed potato well worth the careful attention of the Assembly, the muchvfamed skerry-blue. We need hardly say that Lord Randolph carried his point, and shelved the motion he had so magnificently obstructed. youfigrlawygr to' an old jurist.“ “It isn’t ‘2” “No sir.” “Well, tlut’s lucky, for I don't believe you’d get 3 em all if you were. " A8110!!!) IN A ""1930!" STORM. “It’q not glory I at_n_ w_orl§h.1g {9‘5" _aa§d a “\Yel‘l. I don’t; mm if she dons 1141K about her neighu -l b, there’s one good thing to be said in her fawn; anyhow. ’ “\Vhat‘s that ‘2" “She never fooled away her time on 1; crazy quilt.” Said Bobby to the minihter at dinner : 'Jam 3. church xx hiatle ‘2” ‘ \Vhy do youask ‘2’ “Cos pm owea $I2 back pew rant, am! he says he's going to lat the {ml-ch Whistle for it 2” A Nevada. hunter spent three Tnonths looking fora. grizzly bear, and the man’s relatives have spent three months looking for him. They think he must have found the bear. All doctors agree that to enjny good health the mind must be kept in a cheerful condition. But no doctor can give a man points that will make him joyous when his collar don’t fifi. An exchange observes that widows are always fuvoritias with men. There are some big chunk: of truth in this. A man may “bums his wife every day of hm life, but as soon am She becomes a widow he never even looks cross at her again. “What is the origin of motion?” asked a. celebrated preacher. Well, there are many origins. A call to come up and have a drink will bring fifty men to their feet ins second and a spider down a. girl’s back in the origin of some of the liveliest motion the world 8 VGI‘ I 1W. Anew merchant’s exchange building in Memphis. was opened with prayer, in the course 01 which one member said, “They dealin futures here.” “Yes, I see,” said the other, “and, by George, they might as well open a. jackpot with prayer.” At one of the nptov‘ 11 schools, the prim cipa], in 8- geneml exercise, wrote the: word “drzen” on the black-board and asked the pupils to each write a sentence containing the word; She was somewhat taken aback to find on one of thehwapers the following unique sentence: “1 dozen know my lea- son." “If you are innocent,” said a lawyer to his client, an old darkey, who was charged with stealing sham, “we ought to be able to prove an alibi. At what time was the ham stolen?’ “’Bout lebben o'clock, day nay.” “Well, where were you between eleven o’clock and midnightâ€"in bed ?” “No, sir, I wah hidin’ de ham.” Artemus Ward was traveling on a“ slow going Southern road soon after the ‘ War. When the conductor was punching hia t2‘ 3, Artemun remarked, “Does this railway Lun- pany allow passengers to give it advice, if they do so ins. respectful manner 2" The conductor replied in a gruff tone that be guessed 50. “Well,” Artemus went on, “it occurred to me it would be well to detach the cow-catcher from in front of the engine and hitch it to the rear end of the train. For, you see, we are not liable to overtake a cow ; but what’s: to prevent a cow strol- ling into this cm: and biting aflpaasenger.” A Vermont farmer wanted to get a couple of shingles tacked over a leaky 1)]: co in the roof, but no one dared to try it, as the roof was too steep. The very day the farmer’s daughter came home from boarding school and did the job before she sat down to sup- per. She said she was used to crawling over steep roots. It was: the only way the girls could get out after 9 o’clock. It was a case of breach of promise. The defendant was allowed to say a word in his own behalf. “Yes,” he said, "I kissed her almost continually every evening I called at her house.” Lawyer for the defendantâ€" “Then you confess it ?” Defendantâ€"“Yes, I do confess it, but I had to do it.“ Lawyer â€"-“You had to do it? What do you mean 1’” Defendantâ€"“That was the only way I could keep her from singing." The jury gave a. verdict for the defendant without leaving their seats. A Latin rhetorician says : “ It is not easy be any who are more to be blamed, those who approve of everything they write, or those who are satisfied with nothing.” Thane who are anxious to become acceptâ€" able speakers or writers should digest this sentence, and also the remark of another Roman, who, seeing a student meianoholy, asked him the cause. “Ihave been thinking for three days,” answered the young man, “ about the intro- duction to my oration, and. yet it is not begun." ‘C‘Are you not attemping to do better thtflyou cyflfi was 32-313 alignifipat reply. When William Winter, the poet and dramatic critic, was budding into author- ship, he handed some of his verses to Long- iellow. The poet read them sympathetical- ly, praised them for the promise they gave, and than kindly said : _ Mr. W lnter’s style shows that he headed Longfellow’a caution. Vanity prompts the young writer to be too easily satisfied, or to be to fastidious. Either error is to be “ My young Triend, don’t let lltenry am- bition weaken your style. Be youraelf, and ng§e vzijh simplicify.’: avoided. Gratitude and friendly interest between one person and another do not depend on relationship or rank. The Atlanta (G3,) Constitution relates an interesting case illus- trative of the feeling of the Whites for their former slaves. “ Oil the premises of Sena- tor Brown lives an invalid female servant Whose health failed when she was in the service of the family. She requires the daily treatment of a physician, who is paid by the senator to attand her. It is neces- sary for her to go to the doctor’s office every day. . . n “ Reguiatly every morning Senator Brown’s carriage drives to the door of the cottage which is allotted to the invalid neâ€" gro WOman. She is assisted into it by the senator’s coachman, and is driven to see the doctor. In front of his office the carriage wstits until the (i8.il_,7 consultation is concind ed, and then the woman is carried home.” Why His Wife Never Asked m .a For Money. “ Batterby, my wife is almost Worrylng me to death‘ There isn’t a. day that she doesn't ask mg for mqney.” “ Oh, she hasn't eh? May be she’s dumb ‘3 01' goes through your pockets while you’re asleep 2” H No. " “ Why doesn’t she ask you for money 1" " Her father keeps her. Keeps me, too. V “Isympathize with -you, Mr. Roberts. My wife hasn’t asked me for money since we were married.” Satisfied or Fastidious. M E‘JRRY RH I’I’LES. For His 01d Slave.