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HE TELLS THEM TO ASK THE 1.0.F. JOHN J'. BURNS CURED DODD’S KIDNEY PILLS. He Had Chronic Inflammation of the Kidneysâ€"Says His Brother Foresters Can Tell all About it. Like ridicule, irony is often more effective than argument, and may convey suggestiOns and ideas in a, terse and pithy manner. as when one says, "You can‘t always judge by appearances; the man who wears a diamond pin may be really wealthy." A gentleman, it was once said, never inflicts pain. On which a wlt remarks, “This is hard on the denâ€" Lists." Not a bad story is told of an aged clergyman who met a. man loudly declaiming against foreign missions. “Why,” asked the objector. “doesn't the Church look after the heathen at home?" “We do," said the clergyâ€" man, quietly, and gave the man a tract. “So far as you saw,” said coun- 581 to a. witness, “she was doing her ordinary household duty?" “I should say soâ€"she was talk- ing," was the ironical reply. “Ho never had but one genuine case in his life,” said a lawyer of a rival, "and that was when he prosecuted his studies." Some lawyers have had curious ex- periences of ironical wills. There is the not unfamiliar case of the French merchant who left a handsome legacy to a lady who had refused to marry him twenty years before, in gratiâ€" tude for her kindness in not taking him at his word. There is a good deal of pointed satire in such ironical facetiae as the following: “We are reminded you can't buy a quart of sand and be sure that it is not half sugar." 'A resident in a suburban district was asked how his house had fared during a snowstorm. “Oh. badly," was the reply; “my cistern is the on- ly dry place in it." U"Wot'll I do with this burglar alarm, Billâ€"take it along?" asks burglar number one. Second burglar: “Yes; slip it in the bag. We can get someting for it." Tessâ€"Jack stole a kiss from me last night. flJessâ€"»Gracious! What did you do about it? V Tossâ€"Nothing. I didn’t have time; he made restitution immediately. Life Insurance Companies will not insure a man sufiering from heart trouble. The reason is obvious. This is a serious matter to the husband or father who is solicitous for the future of his dear ones. Of- ten the heart trouble is caused by an unexpected thing and can be cor rected if taken in time and properly treated. A man in Colorado writes: “I was a great cofice drinker for many years, and was not aware of the injurious effects of the habit till I became a practical invalid, sufler- ing‘ from heart trouble. indigestion and nervousness to an extent that made me Wretchedly miserable my- self and a nuisance to those Who witnessed my sufierings. “I continued to drink Coffee, howâ€" ever, not suspecting that it was the cause of my illâ€"health, till. on ap- plying for life insurance I was re- iectad on account of the trouble with my heart. Then I became alarmed. I found that leaving 03 coilee helped me quickly, so I quit it altogether and having been at- tracted by the advertisements of Postuni Food Coffee I began its use. "The change in my condition was remarkable, and it was not. long till I was completely cured. All my ailâ€" ments vanished. My digestion was completely restored, my nervousness disappeared, and, most important of all, my heart steadied down and bc~ “No, came normal, and on a second exâ€" amination I was accepted by the life insurance company. Quitting Coffee and using Postum Worked the cure." ‘Nnmo given by Postum 00., Battle There's a reason, and it is explain- ed in the little book. “The Road to Wellville in each package. TWO IN SUCCESSION EFFECTIVE IRO NY When He Quit Coffee. MiL'h HEART RIGHT A BUSY DAY IN BIRMINGHAM, ENGLAND. The Hospitals Crowded With Sufierers From Baleful Penny Ice. For four hours on a recent Sun- day afternoon and evening the Birâ€" mingham, England, hOSpituls were fairly besieged. A constant stream of vehicles kept arriving and dis~ charging sick childyen. The little ones came in cabs and tramcars, in perambulators and ambulanccs. Many of them were suffering from violent abdominal pains, and all were afilicted with alarming sickness. POISON [N ICE CREAM 7 At first it was feared some and deadly epidemic had broke but inquiries made proved tha but inquiries made proved that they were all patrons of an Italian ice- cream vendor on the Parade. In all 45 cases were attendcd'by the doctors. In many instances the work of the medical men had been made light by the intelligence of the police, who had promptly adminis- tered emetics, without waiting for the doctor. Parents and friends of the sufferers became greatly excited, anticipating the worst consequences. There were some noisy scenes outside the hospiâ€" tal, and then an indignant crowd Went oil‘ in search of the man who had sold the ice cream. He beat a hasty retreat, which was covered by the police. It was well that a. good force of constables was on the scene, or the man would certainly have been handled roughly. The remainder of the ice cream has been seized by the police. It is be- ing kept in a frozen condition and was handed over to the analyst. ICE CREAM FOR BABIES. For a time the condition of some of the children was exceedingly clit- ical and but for the prompt measures taken might have had fatal conseâ€" quences. ,u All the sufferers were discharged from the hospital on Saturday night, though many remain under medical treatment at their homes. A striking feature of the incident is the fact that some of the little sufferers were mites only two years old. At that age it might be thought, even the very best ice cream is liable to have an undesirable ef- fect. Apparently the Italian does not rely upon children for custom. One patient admitted to the hospital was a. man 45 years Df age, who has had to endure a. fire of merciless chaff as a result of his amiable weakness for penny ices. Various Kinds Which Are Very Hard to Obtain. Old and Well-seasoned oak is hard to get and harder to work. There is no great quantity of old oak fur- niture in the market, and old pieces that would supply large enough lumber for important work are selâ€" dom found. New kiln-dried oak is uncertain, being liable to warp and crack. ' Panelled articles can be made of such material with some safety, but large solid articles are likely to give a bad account of themselves at the end of a Winter in a steam-heated house. Nothing looks more ugly than to see a. person whose hands are covered over with warts‘ Why have these disfigure- ments on your person when a. sure re- mover of all Warts, corns, etc., can be found in Holloway's Corn Cure. Rosewood also the best cabinet- makers distrust. This wood has a. peculiar oily quality that makes it unsafe when glued. For this reason rosewood is used chiefly as a veneer. Thin sheets lose much of their oil and take glue satisfactorily. Native walnut is no longer 3. fav- orite with the cabinetmakers. This wood was in effect exhausted a quar- ter of a. century ago or more. and it is now as expensive as mahogany and by no means so beautiful. Chestnut is a. good deal prized, not for furniture, but for wainscotting and for doors. It is sometimes put up in the rough with good efiect, and sometimes oiled and polished. when it is remarkably beautiful considerâ€" ing the cost. Gulf cypress is used with great efâ€" fect in like fashion, and when filled and oiled it makes one of the most beautiful woods for inexpensive in- terior decoration. Cherry was the old substitute for mahogany, and is still a. favorite Wood with the furniture makers. It is, however, not easily obtained in a. properly seasoned condition, for proâ€" per seasoning makes it expensive. The fact is that with cherry, as with oak and mahogany, the season- ing is an important element of cost. The cabinetmaker who must sink his capital for two or three years in wood that is undergoing the process of seasoning finds it hard to com- pete with those who use kiln»dricd material. Mahogany is the favorite wood with the best cabinetmakers. There is a vast amount of seasoned Inaâ€" hogany to be had from ruinous old articles made in the last century \Vhen the rage for mahogany was Well developed; and while the new mahogany is less beautiful than the old, purchasers of furniture seem to have learned that it is Worth while to have the new wood well seasoned. Floating i about ihrc- RARE WOODS. islands, the ceâ€"quarters out, they ice- ‘ quere put h01‘S( it an foreb Sunlight Soap your blankets or will make them fleecy. of a ‘ than quires throw done, it and buckle it round the horse's oil foreleg below the fetlock joint; take a rope eight feet long and tie it to this strap; place a surcingle round the horse's body; take up your posi- tion on the right side of the horse, bring the rope over the horse’s back from the oil‘ side; take hold of the rope, and pull his foot to his body; take a firm hold of this foot, holding it in that position, then take hold of the horse's halter with the left hand, pull his head to you, and press against his body with your elbow, using the words “Lie down." The majority of horses can be thrown in this way in less than a. minute. while others. of course, The majority of horses can be thrown in this way in less than a minute. while others. of course, might fight longer. As soon as the animal has been thrown, take the rope that is underneath him, bring it under the surcingle and pass it through the ring of the halter, and back under the surcingle again, and thus you have the rope in p05ition to bring his head over his shoulder. Make him put his head on the ground, and if he makes any at- tempt to get up, pull his head up immediately, which will prevent, him from rising. This will give him thoroughly to understand that you are master. Once a horse realizes your power over him, he will do al- most anything a. horse can do. Fatherâ€"“You ought to be ashamed of yourself, Dick; you are now in your twenty-fifth year, and you haven't earned a penny 5et. At your age 1 had already married a. woman with ten thousand dollars." The Most. Popular PilI.â€"The pill is the most popular of all forms of medi- cine. and of pill; the most popular are Parmclee's Vegetable Pills, because they do what it is asserted they can do‘ and are not, put forward on any ficti- tious claims to execllence. They are compact and portable. they are easily takenk they do nggnuuse‘ate nor grip‘e', éTx-dnt‘hengivit; {ciibf in the most “Shib- horn cases. Hoâ€"“I am sure Cupid had nothing to do with the alphabet“? NShwâ€"“What givés you that impresâ€" sion?” ‘ It is Known Ever where.â€"Tncm {a not. a city, town or amlet in Unmhlu where Dr. ’I‘homas' Eclectric Oil is nu knownâ€"wherever introduced it. made a foothold [or itself and maintained it Some merchants may uggest some other remedy as equa y bcnnnml. Such recommendations should be re- ceived with doubt. There is only «me Eclectric Oil, and that is Dr. 'l‘humas' Take nothing else. nfiéâ€"“If he had been doing it he would have placed U and I much near- er each other." Wash greasy dishes. pots or puns with Lever’s Dry Soap a. powder. It wxll remove the grease with the greatest ease. Ethel (to her dearest friend)â€"â€""I put my foot in it so dreadfully when Edwin proposed. I meant to say, ‘This is so sudden!’ you know, but I was so flustered that instead I 2x- claimed, 'At last!’ " Signals 01 Dan er.-â€"â€"Have you lost your appetite? lave you a. coated tongue? Have you any unpleasant. taste in the mouth? Does your head ache Mid have you dizziness? If so, your stomach is out of order and you need medicine. But you do not. like medicine He that prefers sickness to medicine must suffer, but under the cir- cumstances the wise man would procure a. box of Parmeleo’s Vegetable Pills and speedily get himself in health, and strive to keep so. "Julia!" yelled the ; don’t you keep that kid qu the matter with it?” “I’m sure I don't, know his patient wife; “I’m sing your lullabics to the “fill! NOT DESIGNED FOR LOVERS HOW red Thoroughly Out < thoroug‘ horse. 1 to thro your ) throw h pluck and a. horse si for go good : take a buckle below eight horse is good and '1 strong 5 a strap yelled the poet, "why keep that kid quiet? Whats .‘hly th e) N0 WONDER THROW I don't, know," replied vile; “I'm singing one of ‘s to the little darling.” re i: him d dei single Take 5 Him :ake t! is no ound will not injure harden them. It soft, white and z the conceit no better It certainly :termination e handed, bu :virtually l all. To do halter on 3 with a ring Id the horse's the no I the HORSE Conceit zit but. out way rc- to t if We Comm Tam ta You ABE TEA, but we could not convince you as easily as a TRlfiL would tfiat BLUE RHEBON is the nearest to PERFECTION that any tea has reached ?EEE§%%%Â¥ 5Adelalde St. Ea t‘ Toronto, Ont. Mention this paper. DOMINION SGHGUL 0f IELEGRHPHY During June, July, August. and September the Chicago and North Western Ry. Will sell from Chicago. round trip excursion tickets to San Francisco, Los Angeles, Portland. Ore. (Lewis & Clarke Excursion), Se- attle, Victoria, Vancouver at very low rates. Correspondineg cheap fares from all points in Canada. Choice of routes, best of train ser- vice, favorable stopovers and liberal return limits. Rates, folders and full information can be obtained from 13. H. Bennett, General Agent. 2 East King St., Toronto. Out. 31 Native servants in India. have the generally desirable though sometimes inconvenient virtue of the Chineseâ€"â€" doing exactly as they are told. The trouble is that they seldom use judgment. Lord Roberts, during a. campaign in India, had ordered his man to prepare his bath at a certain hour. One day a lierce engagement was goâ€" ing on, but the servant made his way through a storm of bullets, and appeared at the commander’s side. “Sahib,” said he, “your bath is “Sahib ready.” Even a better story comes from an unknown soldier, who was awakened, one morning, by feeling the servant of a brother officer pulling at his foot. "Sahib," whispered the man, “sallib, What am I to do? My mas- ter told me to wake him at, half past six, but he did not go to bed vtill seven." Dr. J. D. Kellogg‘s Dysentery Cordial is a speedy cure for dysentery. diar- rhoea, cholera, summer complaint, sea sickness and complaints incidental to children teething. It gives immediate relief to those sufi'ering from the efiects of indiscretion in eating unripe fruit. :ucumbors, etc. It acts with wonderful rapidity and never fails to con uer tho disensa. No one need fear cho era. if they have 11. bottle or this medicine con- veuicnt. Bishop Wilson of Calcutta, whose speeches are often quoted, had the happy faculty of saying the right thing at all times. On one occasion two young people whose father Were famous for their diverse and peculiar views on Bibli- cal subjects came to see the bishop, “Ah,” said he as he greeted one, “your father wrote a great work on the Apocalypse. I congratulate you on being the daughter of such a n man. PACIFIC COAST EX CURSIONS. Then, he said write z forbearl ric A telegraphcr earns from $540.00 to $1800.00 a. year. Do you? If not, let us qualify you to do so. Our free telegraph book explains everything. Write for it to-day. Li§3bygs Veal Loaf, Melrose Pate, Deviled Ham, Dried Beef, Ham Loaf. Vienna Sausage, Baked Beans and Corned Beef Hash. name. :1 on h EX ACT OBEDIENCE a1 turnin “And Address Libby. McNeil] 6. Libby. Chicago ON THE MERITS OE" TWO FATHERS THEY ARE COOKED AND READY TO SERVE B. \V. SOMERS, Wise Housekeepers Always Have a Supply of TRY THE REDALABEL quLITv. The Booklet, “How to Make Good Things to Eat.” sent free‘ th( to his c our father 2 'Apocaly (Natural Flavor) Principal. ther Food Products 1t ARM AT Allilfl'fll'l. 2598 acresâ€"22 calgary; 3 miles from Ainlrie railway depot; convenient to church, schools, stores, etc.; splendidly situated; magni- ficent View; firsL-class soil; good water supply: upâ€"to-date improvements: well- built house of eight rooms. fitted with all modern conveniences and drainage system; stable, cattle sheds, buize’y shed, workshop, corrals. etc; good fences, all new and substantial: will be sold as a. going concern. with stock. crops, machinery, tools and house fur< nishings; this farm is all plowable, and AI 1â€"1:" T>’]‘A._. miles north 0! is especially adapted for rowing ard fall wheat and for mixed arming. ull particulars on anplication to Gray Bros‘. Airdric. Alta. While tiuvcling in Mexico I discover- ed a. drug which removes hair from face, arms, neck, or any part 0! the body instantly and permanently, so will send to any one alliicted without any expense but a. postage stamp. Don't, judge my treatment. by unsuccess- ful attempts of others. I have sufiered for years with this infliction and now my life's Work is to help others from this humiliating trouble. My treat- ment. is easy and accomplished at home, and I will forfeit. $500 if it fails to remove hair. Don’t surfer longer. Re« liei is now yours for the asking. Write now lest you forget my address. DOROTHY HL'H‘JC 1815 North Six- teenth Street, Philadelphia. Pa. Superfluous Ind faded Suits would look bottord ed. 1! no "an I! «min your town. write direct anti-ell, Box 15] ’l‘cd (smilingly)â€"~“You remind me of an old friend of mine." Ethel (haughtily)â€""Indeed! How old, please?” If your children moan and are rest- less during sleep, coupled, when awake. with a. loss of appetite. pale counten- ance, {flaking of the nose. etc... you may depem upon it that the primary cause of the trouble is worms. Mother Gravcs' Worm Exterminator effectually removes these pests, at once relleving the little sufferers. "Do you believe in the theory that the earth is falling into the sun?" "Son1etimes,’ scientific man. summer. In 1 about it." EREEGE Inrrlsu AMERIOAN nvamo co. MONTREAL. VEBUR OVERGOATS KILL THEM ALL AVQHI PDDRL JHWATIDI'IS FL? Pfiflg uu DuuuAu. yulv uuu- “V._ w. is not. only makinayou feel mLarEplE; but, it is doing you arm. Take Summer Colds You should cum that cold 90791100.”? PROTECT YOU R FOOD VARS ING IM’PRESSION. WELSON’S mes," aiuswered the un- man. "I believe it in the In the winter I forget Hair Permanently Removed Philadelphia Tr 9'0. 33â€"05. e Lung me you. Your a. bottle.